Greetings Board! I have a pressing matter on my hands and need to address it immediately. So, I was playing some 45 shim, casual, odd dog action today with some homies and something horrible happened. Before I get to my misfortune I will inform the board of the round until that point. We tee'd off on hole 1 at approximately 6:00pm and the Disc Golf Gods granted all 8 of us with a star frame. Holes 2-5 went well, except one of our fellow brothers decided to hyzer a 150 gram dragon into the swamp/pond on hole 2. (F.Y.I. dragons do not float in water and water moccasins are highly attracted to them.) After wading through the swamp/pond for about 45 minutes and eventually putting out on hole 5 we made our way to hole 6.
Before I get ahead of myself I would like to state that I parked a roller on hole 5 and was the only one to get a birdie so I had the pleasure of teeing off first on hole 6. Like anyone in my position after 3 penthouses and a roller park job, I decided to try out my newly tuned 165 gram Steady Ed Signature Blowfly. Before approaching the pad I gracefully brushed my Blowfly with my birdie bag as if it was some majestic disc about to finish up on hole 18 at the Amateur Worlds. I decided to roll the Blowfly because the grass seemed to be groomed and I thought it would be the best way to mark a birdie or perhaps a roller ace. I thought everything was going well until I grip locked my Blowfly and lost site of it.
This is where I need to make my point and hopefully this will open up some eyes and create some action or change. While looking for my lost dog I noticed that there were many fairway imperfections that caused me to grip lock and lose my Blowfly. I cannot take full responsibility for these imperfections. Only those associated with the Lenora Park Disc Golf Course can. I majored in Landscape Architecture back in '79 and know my grass. For most of you that don't know the fairways at Lenora, we are dealing with Rough Bluegrass. Rough Bluegrass is commonly mistaken for Kentucky Bluegrass. For an avid disc golfer this can be fatal while throwing a roller. Many "people" mistake Rough Bluegrass for the sickly Kentucky Bluegrass. The truth is that this is its own type of grass. Unfortunately, for my Blowfly and probably many other lost dogs, this grass is very sensitive and doesn't thrive in any but the coldest of climates. This explains why the average round at Lenora is much better from the months of October through February.
So, your probably asking yourself, where do we go from here? Well, I have taken it upon myself to contact the necessary officials to fix this problem. It will take some patience from the disc golf community but it is in everyone's best interest that we follow through with this. I have not yet drafted the the final report but it will take closing down hole 6 for roughly 8 months in order to extract all the grass that presently stands there. We will then go in and replace the defective grass with the correct grass. After the replacement there is another 6 month waiting period so that we can make sure there is optimal growth. After this 14 month period I promise there will not be any complaints associated with hole 6.
Thank you for your time and may the course be with you!
"When in doubt...throw a roller." - Steady Ed